美国学入学申请书(精选篇)
第篇：美国学入学申请求
english namechinese nametoefl
1princeton university(nj)普林斯顿学 (新泽西)y
2harvard university(ma)哈佛学 (马萨诸塞)y
3yale university(ct)耶鲁学 (康涅狄格)600pbt250cbt or 100 ibt
4california institute of technology (ca)加州理工学院y
4stanford university(ca)斯坦佛学 (加州)not required
4massachusetts inst of technology (ma)麻省理工学院y
7university of pennsylvania (pa)宾西法尼亚学y
8duke university(nc)杜克学 (北卡)600pbt250cbt100ibt
9dartmouth college(nh)达特茅斯学院 (新罕布什尔)y
9columbia university(ny)哥伦亚学 (纽约)600pbt250cbt or 100 ibt
9university of chicago (il)芝加哥学 (伊利诺)600pbt250cbt or 104 ibt or 70ielts
12cornell university(ny)康奈尔 (纽约)y
12washington university in st louis (mo)圣露易斯华盛顿学 (密苏里)y
14northwestern university(il)西北学 (伊利诺)600pbt250cbt100ibtielts 15brown university(ri)布朗学 (罗德岛)600pbt250cbt
16johns hopkins university(md)约翰斯霍普金斯学 (马里兰)600pbt250cbt99ibt
17rice university(tx)莱斯学 (德克萨斯)y
18vanderbilt university(tn)范德堡学 (田纳西)y
18emory university(ga)挨默里学 (乔治亚)600pbt250cbt
20university of notre dame(in)圣母学 (印第安)y
21carnegie mellon university(pa)卡基梅隆 (宾西法尼亚)≥250 on the computerbased(cbt) or ≥600 on the paperbased(pbt)
21university of california—berkeley * (ca)加州学伯克利分校≥220 on the computerbased(cbt) or 550 on the paperbased(pbt) or ibt≥83
23georgetown university(dc)乔治城学 (华盛顿特区)600pbt
24university of virginia * (va)弗吉尼亚学y
24university of michigan—ann arbor * (mi)密歇根学安阿伯分校y
26univ of california—los angeles * (ca)加州学洛杉矶分校≥220 on cbt or 550 on pbt or ibt≥83
27u of north carolina—chapel hill * (nc)北卡学教堂山分校≥600 on pbt or ≥250 on cbt
27univ of southern california (ca)南加州学≥600 on pbt or ≥250 on cbt ibt≥100
27tufts university(ma)塔夫斯学 (马萨诸塞)≥250 on cbt
30wake forest university(nc)维克森林学 (北卡)y
31college of william and mary(va) *威廉玛丽学院 (弗吉尼亚)≥600 on pbt or≥250 on cbt
31brandeis university(ma)布兰迪学 (马萨诸塞)≥600 on pbt or≥250 on cbt
or ≥100 on ibt
33lehigh university(pa)利哈伊学 (宾西法尼亚)≥570 on pbt or ≥230 on cbt 34univ of wisconsin—madison * (wi)威斯康星学麦迪逊分校≥550 on pbt or≥213 on cbt
≥80 on ibt
34boston college (ma)波士顿学院 (马萨诸塞)600 on pbt or 250 on cbt or 100 on ibt
34new york university (ny)纽约学y
34university of rochester(ny)罗切斯特学 (纽约)550 on pbt or 213 on cbt or 85 on ibt
38case western reserve univ(oh)凯斯西储学 (俄亥俄)550 pbt213 cbt or 80 ibt
38univ of california—san diego * (ca)加州学圣戈迭分校y
38georgia institute of technology * (ga)佐治亚理工学院600pbt250cbt or 100 ibt 41u of illinois—urbana champaign * (il)伊利诺学香槟分校y
42university of washington * (wa)华盛顿学580pbt or 237cbt or
70ibt(without speaking)
42rensselaer polytechnic inst(ny)伦斯勒理工学院 (纽约)570pbt or 230cbt or 88ibt
44university of california—irvine * (ca)加州学欧文分校550pbt or 213cbt 44tulane university(la)杜兰学 (路易斯安州)y
44yeshiva university(ny)叶史瓦学 (纽约)563pbt or 225cbt
47pennsylvania state u—university park * (pa)宾州学帕克分校550pbt or 213cbt or 80ibt
47university of texas—austin * (tx)德州学奥斯汀分校y
47university of california—davis * (ca)加州学戴维斯分校500pbt
47univ of california—santa barbara * (ca)加州学圣芭芭拉分校550pbt or 213cbt or 79ibt
47university of florida * (fl)佛罗里达学550pbt or 213cbt or 80ibt
52george washington university(dc)乔治华盛顿学 (华盛顿特区)y
52syracuse university(ny)雪城学 (威斯康辛州)y
54pepperdine university(ca)佩珀代学 (加利福尼亚)550pbt or 220cbt or 80ibt 54university of miami(fl)迈阿密学 (佛罗里达)y
54univ of maryland—college park * (md)马里兰学帕克分校y
57ohio state university—columbus * (oh)俄亥俄州立学哥伦布分校527pbt197cbt71ibt
57university of pittsburgh * (pa)匹兹堡学 (宾州)550pbt213cbt80ibt 57boston university (ma)波士顿学 (麻萨诸塞)550pbt250cbt
60miami university—oxford(oh) *迈阿密学牛津分校 (俄亥俄)530pbt200cbt72ibt
60texas a&m univ—college station * (tx)德克萨斯a&m学卡城分校550pbt213cbt80ibt
60university of georgia * (ga)乔治亚学 (佐治亚)213cbt80ibt70ielts 60rutgers—new brunswick(nj) *罗格斯学新伯朗士威校区 (新泽西)y
64purdue univ—west lafayette(in) *普渡学西拉法叶校区 (印第安纳)y 64university of iowa * (ia)爱荷华学530pbt197cbt71ibt
64worcester polytechnic inst(ma)伍斯特理工学院 (马萨诸塞)550pbt213cbt65ielts
67university of connecticut * (ct)康涅狄格学y
university of delaware * (de)德拉华学550pbt213cbt80ibt
67univ of minnesota—twin cities * (mn)明尼苏达学twin cities分校213cbt79ibt 70clemson university(sc) *克莱姆森学 (南卡罗纳)y
70southern methodist university(tx)南卫理工会学 (德克萨斯)550pbt213cbt65ielts
70brigham young univ—provo(ut)杨百翰学 (犹)500pbt173cbt66ibt
70indiana university—bloomington * (in)印安学伯明顿分校560pbt223cbt 70michigan state university * (mi)密歇根州立学550pbt213cbt79ibt
70fordham university(ny)福特汉姆学 (纽约)y
76univ of california—santa cruz * (ca)加州学圣克鲁兹分校pbt550gre1600 77virginia tech * (va)维吉尼亚理工学y
77university of colorado—boulder * (co)科罗拉学波尔分校550pbt173cbt61ibt
77st louis university (mo)圣路易斯学 (密苏里)525pbt194cbt60ielts 77stevens institute of technology(nj)斯蒂文斯理工学院 (新泽西)
81north carolina state u—raleigh * (nc)北卡罗纳州立学550pbt213cbt79ibt 81baylor university(tx)贝勒学 (德克萨斯)540pbt207cbt76ibt
81marquette university(wi)马凯特学 (威斯康新)y
81iowa state university * (ia)爱荷华州立学500pbt173cbt50ielts
81clark university(ma)克拉克学 (马萨诸塞)550650pbt213280cbt
86american university(dc)美国学 (华盛顿特区)550pbt213cbt80ibt 86suny—binghamton * (ny)纽约州立学宾汉姆学550pbt213cbt80ibt 88university of tulsa(ok)塔尔萨学 (俄克拉荷马)500pbt173cbt
88university of tennessee * (tn)田纳西学523pbt193cbt70ibt
88university of vermont * (vt)佛蒙特学550pbt213cbt7980ibt
88university of alabama * (al)阿拉巴马学500pbt173cbt61ibt
88auburn university(al) *奥学 (阿拉巴马)550pbt213cbt
88univ of california—riverside * (ca)加州学河滨分校550pbt213cbt79ibt7ielts
88university of denver (co)丹佛学 (科罗拉)y
88howard university(dc)霍华德学 (华盛顿特区)y
88university of kansas * (ks)堪萨斯学subscore 57pbt45twesubscore23cbt and 45 on the essay subscore 23 ibt
88univ of missouri—columbia * (mo)密苏里学哥伦亚分校500pbt173cbt61ibt 98university of arizona * (az)亚利桑学500pbt173cbt61ibt
98university of the pacific(ca)太洋学 (加州)475550pbt150213cbt
98northeastern university(ma)美国东北学 (马萨诸塞)550pbt213cbt7980ibt60ielts
98univ of massachusetts—amherst * (ma)马萨诸塞学艾姆赫斯特校
区550pbt213cbt
98univ of nebraska—lincoln * (ne)布拉斯加学林肯分校525pbt193cbt
98suny col of envirnmtl sci & frstry * (ny)美国纽约州立学环境科学林业科学学院550pbt213cbt7980ibt60ielts
98suny—stony brook * (ny)纽约州立学石溪分校550pbt213cbt65ielts
y表示需成绩没具体数字 压缩文件excel发吧
外08年新版没出
第二篇：申请美国学入学文书范
申请美国学入学文书范
i guess it was inevitable that i’d be on hockey skates at some point in mylife but i did not expect that i’d become one of a rare group of female icehockey officials before i even reached high school being born into a family ofhockey players and figure skaters it seemed that my destiny had already beendecided
right from the beginning my two older brothers and my father strapped meup and threw me onto the ice i loved it and in my mind i was on my way tobecoming a female gretzky but my mom had to think of something fast to drag herlittle girl away from this sport of ruffians enter my first hot pink figureskating dress that was all it took to launch fifteen years of competitivefigure skating even though figure skating soon became my passion i always hadan unsatisfied yearning for ice hockey it took a great deal of convincing frommy parents that competitive figure skating and ice hockey didn’t mix my compromise became refereeing ice hockey little did i know that i wasbeginning an activity that would influence my character and who i am today wheni began i would only work with my dad and brothers everyone was friendly andaccepting because i had just started i soon realized though that to get betteri needed to start refereeing with people i wasn’t related to and that’s when myexperience drastically changed an apologetic smile and an i’m sorry wasn’tgoing to
get me through games now as i began officiating higherlevel games anddealing with more arrogant coaches i suddenly entered a new maledominatedworld a world i had never experienced before my confidence was shot and all iwanted to do was get through each game and be able to leave sometimes i waseven too scared to skate along the teams’ benches because i would get upset bywhat the coaches would yell to me do you have a hot date tonight ref was atypical comment that coaches would spit at me during the course of a game intheir eyes i did not belong on that ice and they were going to do whateverthey could do to make sure no women wanted to officiate their games i wasdetermined not to let them chase me off the ice
i made the decision to stand up for myself i never responded rudely to thecoaches but i did not let them walk all over me and destroy my confidenceanymore i started to act and feel more like the 4year certified atlanticdistrict official that i am there were still a few situations that scared meone time i called a penalty in a championship game during the third overtime andthe team i penalized ended up losing because they got scored on i knew i hadmade the right call even though i was unnerved when i saw the losing teams’parents waiting for me at my locker room for the moment i wished i hadn’tcalled that penalty although it was scary at the time i stood my ground andovercame my fears that was an important
steppingstone in my officiating careerand in my life
after four years of refereeing i still can’t say it’s easy every gamehands me something new and i never know what to expect now i have theconfidence and preparation to deal with the unexpected on and off the ice inow also know to take everything with a grain of salt and not let it get to mei have learned that life is just like being out on the ice if i am prepared andact with confidence i will be perceived as confident these are the littlelessons that i’m grateful to have learned as a woman referee
things to notice about this essay
1 the author tells an interesting story about her experiences as areferee
2 a sense of her personality—determination flexibility good humor—comesthrough in the narration
3 details like do you have a hot date tonight ref make the narrationmemorable (we’d love to hear more of these kinds of details)
4 the essay needs a faster start the first paragraph tences—and gives away theessay’s surprise in the second a good revision would delete all of paragraphone and start at paragraph two
5 there’s too much frame here and not enough picture the essay needsfurther development especially about the difficulties of
becoming and being aref to keep it vivid
6 the author should dwell in the meaning of the experience a little moreat the end—i wonder about…i also think…sometimes i believe… significantexperiences like this one woven through many years of the author’s life don’tmean just one thing—there are more insights and lessons to explore here
第三篇：学入学申请书
尊敬校领导您
学压力放弃高考理想追求没停止求知步伐知识济时代学历成未说学历块敲门砖果没块敲门砖连门进谈施展华抱负呢
知贵校职业科正招生中热切希贵校机会贵校坐落历史文化古城开封悠久文历史文化涵学校破传统高分观念注重学生综合素质发展贵校特色希贵校机会颗渴飞翔心片广阔天空
祝愿您身体健康工作利 726
第四篇：日文版学入学申请书
学長閣拝具：
阪城を築き百姓から天へとった豊臣秀吉様の逸話は十六歳の際に初めてで読みましたそのことをきっかけにして私は豊臣秀吉様び阪に興味を持ちました学に入って日語を勉強して『日商業の４００年』というで阪の堂島の米市場では世界で初の先物取引が行われたということがわかりました私の外祖父が生商業をしていますので私はさい頃から外祖父の逸話を聞いていすそれに父はずっと「仁義礼智信はいつでも忘れるな」というふうに私を教育しています儒学と商業の雰囲気に包まれている私は数百年にわたる彩な商業の歴史を持っている阪に意があって阪の商業社会を理解し阪で成功した松幸助様の営業の哲学に少しでも触れ分の会社を創り出したいと存じますまた先生や先輩から「阪の々は熱意で親切でよくを助ける」と聞いて「もし日へ留学したらぜひ阪へ行きたい」と存じます
そういうわけで私はxx学へ入学したいものです半年でも貴校の授業やクラブ活動によって分の日語の力をしたいですまたボランティア活動を参加したり日の学生と良く交流したりするつもりです学を卒業しまた阪へ行き阪学経済学研究科経営学系専攻を目指して頑張って勉強し続けると存じます
分の会社分がする商事によって中日双方の企業家の間に善隣友関係を深め互恵等の基礎に立って相互の利益を尊重しつつ協力したいと念じております
学長閣のいよいよの御健勝をお祈リ申しげます
第五篇：香港学入学申请书
dear professor
my name is xxx a high school of 2014 from xxx high school i have been yearning to study in the university of hong kong for a long time
first of all the international environment attracts me the most with the suitable background that the university of hong kong offers i will be able to absorb different cultures and ideas from different country and improve my english level swiftly which are comparatively impracticable in the universities of the mainland secondly many colleges of the university of hong kong are globalrecognized which approve students’ academic research enlargement stretching into a new era thirdly the university of hong kong shows respect to students by offering high teaching qualities with abundant excellent teachers all over the world
in a word the university of hong kong fits my evaluation standard in all rounds however i’m now wondering whether i could reach the level that you suggest in the aspect of learning i entered the best class of my school with good scores showing the studying achievement of my first high school year and keep stable nice scores till now besides inclass knowledge i also won two national physical prizes and one national chinese
writing contest i also took part in many activities during the past two years such as singing competitions debate contests poster painting etc but the most fatal disadvantages of me is that i haven’t read many books in english which may prevent me from acquiring information in a high speed but i believe i will go through all the hardship and prove my choice’s profound value by action
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第篇：美国学入学申请求
english namechinese nametoefl
1princeton university(nj)普林斯顿学 (新泽西)y
2harvard university(ma)哈佛学 (马萨诸塞)y
3yale university(ct)耶鲁学 (康涅狄格)600pbt250cbt or 100 ibt
4california institute of technology (ca)加州理工学院y
4stanford university(ca)斯坦佛学 (加州)not required
4massachusetts inst of technology (ma)麻省理工学院y
7university of pennsylvania (pa)宾西法尼亚学y
8duke university(nc)杜克学 (北卡)600pbt250cbt100ibt
9dartmouth college(nh)达特茅斯学院 (新罕布什尔)y
9columbia university(ny)哥伦亚学 (纽约)600pbt250cbt or 100 ibt
9university of chicago (il)芝加哥学 (伊利诺)600pbt250cbt or 104 ibt or 70ielts
12cornell university(ny)康奈尔 (纽约)y
12washington university in st louis (mo)圣露易斯华盛顿学 (密苏里)y
14northwestern university(il)西北学 (伊利诺)600pbt250cbt100ibtielts 15brown university(ri)布朗学 (罗德岛)600pbt250cbt
16johns hopkins university(md)约翰斯霍普金斯学 (马里兰)600pbt250cbt99ibt
17rice university(tx)莱斯学 (德克萨斯)y
18vanderbilt university(tn)范德堡学 (田纳西)y
18emory university(ga)挨默里学 (乔治亚)600pbt250cbt
20university of notre dame(in)圣母学 (印第安)y
21carnegie mellon university(pa)卡基梅隆 (宾西法尼亚)≥250 on the computerbased(cbt) or ≥600 on the paperbased(pbt)
21university of california—berkeley * (ca)加州学伯克利分校≥220 on the computerbased(cbt) or 550 on the paperbased(pbt) or ibt≥83
23georgetown university(dc)乔治城学 (华盛顿特区)600pbt
24university of virginia * (va)弗吉尼亚学y
24university of michigan—ann arbor * (mi)密歇根学安阿伯分校y
26univ of california—los angeles * (ca)加州学洛杉矶分校≥220 on cbt or 550 on pbt or ibt≥83
27u of north carolina—chapel hill * (nc)北卡学教堂山分校≥600 on pbt or ≥250 on cbt
27univ of southern california (ca)南加州学≥600 on pbt or ≥250 on cbt ibt≥100
27tufts university(ma)塔夫斯学 (马萨诸塞)≥250 on cbt
30wake forest university(nc)维克森林学 (北卡)y
31college of william and mary(va) *威廉玛丽学院 (弗吉尼亚)≥600 on pbt or≥250 on cbt
31brandeis university(ma)布兰迪学 (马萨诸塞)≥600 on pbt or≥250 on cbt
or ≥100 on ibt
33lehigh university(pa)利哈伊学 (宾西法尼亚)≥570 on pbt or ≥230 on cbt 34univ of wisconsin—madison * (wi)威斯康星学麦迪逊分校≥550 on pbt or≥213 on cbt
≥80 on ibt
34boston college (ma)波士顿学院 (马萨诸塞)600 on pbt or 250 on cbt or 100 on ibt
34new york university (ny)纽约学y
34university of rochester(ny)罗切斯特学 (纽约)550 on pbt or 213 on cbt or 85 on ibt
38case western reserve univ(oh)凯斯西储学 (俄亥俄)550 pbt213 cbt or 80 ibt
38univ of california—san diego * (ca)加州学圣戈迭分校y
38georgia institute of technology * (ga)佐治亚理工学院600pbt250cbt or 100 ibt 41u of illinois—urbana champaign * (il)伊利诺学香槟分校y
42university of washington * (wa)华盛顿学580pbt or 237cbt or
70ibt(without speaking)
42rensselaer polytechnic inst(ny)伦斯勒理工学院 (纽约)570pbt or 230cbt or 88ibt
44university of california—irvine * (ca)加州学欧文分校550pbt or 213cbt 44tulane university(la)杜兰学 (路易斯安州)y
44yeshiva university(ny)叶史瓦学 (纽约)563pbt or 225cbt
47pennsylvania state u—university park * (pa)宾州学帕克分校550pbt or 213cbt or 80ibt
47university of texas—austin * (tx)德州学奥斯汀分校y
47university of california—davis * (ca)加州学戴维斯分校500pbt
47univ of california—santa barbara * (ca)加州学圣芭芭拉分校550pbt or 213cbt or 79ibt
47university of florida * (fl)佛罗里达学550pbt or 213cbt or 80ibt
52george washington university(dc)乔治华盛顿学 (华盛顿特区)y
52syracuse university(ny)雪城学 (威斯康辛州)y
54pepperdine university(ca)佩珀代学 (加利福尼亚)550pbt or 220cbt or 80ibt 54university of miami(fl)迈阿密学 (佛罗里达)y
54univ of maryland—college park * (md)马里兰学帕克分校y
57ohio state university—columbus * (oh)俄亥俄州立学哥伦布分校527pbt197cbt71ibt
57university of pittsburgh * (pa)匹兹堡学 (宾州)550pbt213cbt80ibt 57boston university (ma)波士顿学 (麻萨诸塞)550pbt250cbt
60miami university—oxford(oh) *迈阿密学牛津分校 (俄亥俄)530pbt200cbt72ibt
60texas a&m univ—college station * (tx)德克萨斯a&m学卡城分校550pbt213cbt80ibt
60university of georgia * (ga)乔治亚学 (佐治亚)213cbt80ibt70ielts 60rutgers—new brunswick(nj) *罗格斯学新伯朗士威校区 (新泽西)y
64purdue univ—west lafayette(in) *普渡学西拉法叶校区 (印第安纳)y 64university of iowa * (ia)爱荷华学530pbt197cbt71ibt
64worcester polytechnic inst(ma)伍斯特理工学院 (马萨诸塞)550pbt213cbt65ielts
67university of connecticut * (ct)康涅狄格学y
university of delaware * (de)德拉华学550pbt213cbt80ibt
67univ of minnesota—twin cities * (mn)明尼苏达学twin cities分校213cbt79ibt 70clemson university(sc) *克莱姆森学 (南卡罗纳)y
70southern methodist university(tx)南卫理工会学 (德克萨斯)550pbt213cbt65ielts
70brigham young univ—provo(ut)杨百翰学 (犹)500pbt173cbt66ibt
70indiana university—bloomington * (in)印安学伯明顿分校560pbt223cbt 70michigan state university * (mi)密歇根州立学550pbt213cbt79ibt
70fordham university(ny)福特汉姆学 (纽约)y
76univ of california—santa cruz * (ca)加州学圣克鲁兹分校pbt550gre1600 77virginia tech * (va)维吉尼亚理工学y
77university of colorado—boulder * (co)科罗拉学波尔分校550pbt173cbt61ibt
77st louis university (mo)圣路易斯学 (密苏里)525pbt194cbt60ielts 77stevens institute of technology(nj)斯蒂文斯理工学院 (新泽西)
81north carolina state u—raleigh * (nc)北卡罗纳州立学550pbt213cbt79ibt 81baylor university(tx)贝勒学 (德克萨斯)540pbt207cbt76ibt
81marquette university(wi)马凯特学 (威斯康新)y
81iowa state university * (ia)爱荷华州立学500pbt173cbt50ielts
81clark university(ma)克拉克学 (马萨诸塞)550650pbt213280cbt
86american university(dc)美国学 (华盛顿特区)550pbt213cbt80ibt 86suny—binghamton * (ny)纽约州立学宾汉姆学550pbt213cbt80ibt 88university of tulsa(ok)塔尔萨学 (俄克拉荷马)500pbt173cbt
88university of tennessee * (tn)田纳西学523pbt193cbt70ibt
88university of vermont * (vt)佛蒙特学550pbt213cbt7980ibt
88university of alabama * (al)阿拉巴马学500pbt173cbt61ibt
88auburn university(al) *奥学 (阿拉巴马)550pbt213cbt
88univ of california—riverside * (ca)加州学河滨分校550pbt213cbt79ibt7ielts
88university of denver (co)丹佛学 (科罗拉)y
88howard university(dc)霍华德学 (华盛顿特区)y
88university of kansas * (ks)堪萨斯学subscore 57pbt45twesubscore23cbt and 45 on the essay subscore 23 ibt
88univ of missouri—columbia * (mo)密苏里学哥伦亚分校500pbt173cbt61ibt 98university of arizona * (az)亚利桑学500pbt173cbt61ibt
98university of the pacific(ca)太洋学 (加州)475550pbt150213cbt
98northeastern university(ma)美国东北学 (马萨诸塞)550pbt213cbt7980ibt60ielts
98univ of massachusetts—amherst * (ma)马萨诸塞学艾姆赫斯特校
区550pbt213cbt
98univ of nebraska—lincoln * (ne)布拉斯加学林肯分校525pbt193cbt
98suny col of envirnmtl sci & frstry * (ny)美国纽约州立学环境科学林业科学学院550pbt213cbt7980ibt60ielts
98suny—stony brook * (ny)纽约州立学石溪分校550pbt213cbt65ielts
y表示需成绩没具体数字 压缩文件excel发吧
外08年新版没出
第二篇：申请美国学入学文书范
申请美国学入学文书范
i guess it was inevitable that i’d be on hockey skates at some point in mylife but i did not expect that i’d become one of a rare group of female icehockey officials before i even reached high school being born into a family ofhockey players and figure skaters it seemed that my destiny had already beendecided
right from the beginning my two older brothers and my father strapped meup and threw me onto the ice i loved it and in my mind i was on my way tobecoming a female gretzky but my mom had to think of something fast to drag herlittle girl away from this sport of ruffians enter my first hot pink figureskating dress that was all it took to launch fifteen years of competitivefigure skating even though figure skating soon became my passion i always hadan unsatisfied yearning for ice hockey it took a great deal of convincing frommy parents that competitive figure skating and ice hockey didn’t mix my compromise became refereeing ice hockey little did i know that i wasbeginning an activity that would influence my character and who i am today wheni began i would only work with my dad and brothers everyone was friendly andaccepting because i had just started i soon realized though that to get betteri needed to start refereeing with people i wasn’t related to and that’s when myexperience drastically changed an apologetic smile and an i’m sorry wasn’tgoing to
get me through games now as i began officiating higherlevel games anddealing with more arrogant coaches i suddenly entered a new maledominatedworld a world i had never experienced before my confidence was shot and all iwanted to do was get through each game and be able to leave sometimes i waseven too scared to skate along the teams’ benches because i would get upset bywhat the coaches would yell to me do you have a hot date tonight ref was atypical comment that coaches would spit at me during the course of a game intheir eyes i did not belong on that ice and they were going to do whateverthey could do to make sure no women wanted to officiate their games i wasdetermined not to let them chase me off the ice
i made the decision to stand up for myself i never responded rudely to thecoaches but i did not let them walk all over me and destroy my confidenceanymore i started to act and feel more like the 4year certified atlanticdistrict official that i am there were still a few situations that scared meone time i called a penalty in a championship game during the third overtime andthe team i penalized ended up losing because they got scored on i knew i hadmade the right call even though i was unnerved when i saw the losing teams’parents waiting for me at my locker room for the moment i wished i hadn’tcalled that penalty although it was scary at the time i stood my ground andovercame my fears that was an important
steppingstone in my officiating careerand in my life
after four years of refereeing i still can’t say it’s easy every gamehands me something new and i never know what to expect now i have theconfidence and preparation to deal with the unexpected on and off the ice inow also know to take everything with a grain of salt and not let it get to mei have learned that life is just like being out on the ice if i am prepared andact with confidence i will be perceived as confident these are the littlelessons that i’m grateful to have learned as a woman referee
things to notice about this essay
1 the author tells an interesting story about her experiences as areferee
2 a sense of her personality—determination flexibility good humor—comesthrough in the narration
3 details like do you have a hot date tonight ref make the narrationmemorable (we’d love to hear more of these kinds of details)
4 the essay needs a faster start the first paragraph tences—and gives away theessay’s surprise in the second a good revision would delete all of paragraphone and start at paragraph two
5 there’s too much frame here and not enough picture the essay needsfurther development especially about the difficulties of
becoming and being aref to keep it vivid
6 the author should dwell in the meaning of the experience a little moreat the end—i wonder about…i also think…sometimes i believe… significantexperiences like this one woven through many years of the author’s life don’tmean just one thing—there are more insights and lessons to explore here
第三篇：学入学申请书
尊敬校领导您
学压力放弃高考理想追求没停止求知步伐知识济时代学历成未说学历块敲门砖果没块敲门砖连门进谈施展华抱负呢
知贵校职业科正招生中热切希贵校机会贵校坐落历史文化古城开封悠久文历史文化涵学校破传统高分观念注重学生综合素质发展贵校特色希贵校机会颗渴飞翔心片广阔天空
祝愿您身体健康工作利 726
第四篇：日文版学入学申请书
学長閣拝具：
阪城を築き百姓から天へとった豊臣秀吉様の逸話は十六歳の際に初めてで読みましたそのことをきっかけにして私は豊臣秀吉様び阪に興味を持ちました学に入って日語を勉強して『日商業の４００年』というで阪の堂島の米市場では世界で初の先物取引が行われたということがわかりました私の外祖父が生商業をしていますので私はさい頃から外祖父の逸話を聞いていすそれに父はずっと「仁義礼智信はいつでも忘れるな」というふうに私を教育しています儒学と商業の雰囲気に包まれている私は数百年にわたる彩な商業の歴史を持っている阪に意があって阪の商業社会を理解し阪で成功した松幸助様の営業の哲学に少しでも触れ分の会社を創り出したいと存じますまた先生や先輩から「阪の々は熱意で親切でよくを助ける」と聞いて「もし日へ留学したらぜひ阪へ行きたい」と存じます
そういうわけで私はxx学へ入学したいものです半年でも貴校の授業やクラブ活動によって分の日語の力をしたいですまたボランティア活動を参加したり日の学生と良く交流したりするつもりです学を卒業しまた阪へ行き阪学経済学研究科経営学系専攻を目指して頑張って勉強し続けると存じます
分の会社分がする商事によって中日双方の企業家の間に善隣友関係を深め互恵等の基礎に立って相互の利益を尊重しつつ協力したいと念じております
学長閣のいよいよの御健勝をお祈リ申しげます
第五篇：香港学入学申请书
dear professor
my name is xxx a high school of 2014 from xxx high school i have been yearning to study in the university of hong kong for a long time
first of all the international environment attracts me the most with the suitable background that the university of hong kong offers i will be able to absorb different cultures and ideas from different country and improve my english level swiftly which are comparatively impracticable in the universities of the mainland secondly many colleges of the university of hong kong are globalrecognized which approve students’ academic research enlargement stretching into a new era thirdly the university of hong kong shows respect to students by offering high teaching qualities with abundant excellent teachers all over the world
in a word the university of hong kong fits my evaluation standard in all rounds however i’m now wondering whether i could reach the level that you suggest in the aspect of learning i entered the best class of my school with good scores showing the studying achievement of my first high school year and keep stable nice scores till now besides inclass knowledge i also won two national physical prizes and one national chinese
writing contest i also took part in many activities during the past two years such as singing competitions debate contests poster painting etc but the most fatal disadvantages of me is that i haven’t read many books in english which may prevent me from acquiring information in a high speed but i believe i will go through all the hardship and prove my choice’s profound value by action
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